I saw that weakness inside your eyes
Good to know people are viewing the blog with the meter at the bottom, slowly but surely I will think of new stuff to add in to spicen up the blog. Today I couldn't remember much, only the rushing off to work and working..at work.
But the one thing that would never leave my mind is the incident that happened on the dining table at dinner just now. Dad was asking me about stuff he would want to know more, but I was impatient, I blasted off and said that he was irritating and I couldn't stand him no more. I said worst stuff, I can't recall. I put him down so badly about how lazy and slow he was. Like he was the worst father ever...
And then I saw it, a certain amount of water filled his eyes. Through those eyes, I saw never ending sadness. I saw the face of a person who thinks he is hopeless and useless. The worse thing I saw in his expression was...disappointment..
Was he ever so impatient when he was teaching me how to walk, how to read, write, talk, respect, love, save and so much more? Was he so harsh that he would scold me for something I didn't know I did wrong? Did he ever shouted, or even caned me at all? The one thing I respect about my father most is that he is kind and loving.
I have hated him so much, I have treated him so badly because he was so lazy and I couldn't stand it. I hated him so much because he complained about everything single thing I did and never cease to shut up. But he was still kind, he still loved me, and that's why he did that.
Am I too young to understand how that 49 year old man thinks? Or am I just lending a deaf ear to him and closing my mind to think about hating him? So who is the devil now? Me. What have I done....
It then hit me to how bad a monster I've turned into. I pulled up my courage, I apologised immediatedly about how I've been treating him lately, and slowly explained and taught him how to go about the digital stuff. I taught him the internet today.
I must return the favour, because I can't repay him for the amount of things he has sacrificed for me....
Signing out
Where the possible human meets the impossible life...
-About Me-
-The Past-
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
~Xuhan
~Clara
~Jessica
~Alvin
~Amanda
~Ben Choo
~Sufi
~Fardly
~Sufi
~Nic Lai
~Sze Ling
~Yang
~Mark Hoppus
~Diana & Madeline
~Tyshaa
~Sabrina
-The Hits-
